Relationships Are NOT Meant To Last

Would I be negative to say relationships just aren’t meant to last?

I’m not bitter nor heartbroken lol… but reality is the likely of relationships lasting forever is almost next to none.

Jay, how do you know this?

Well for one… Everybody has an ex! Everybody! And when you first got with that ex, your expectations were for that to last forever correct?

Everybody I know who we’re once together is now apart. Couples I never thought would break up are separated.

See relationships today are just temporary fixes for the heart. It feels good for the limited time it lasts.

Don’t be mad at me. Be mad at facts!

“My next relationship will be my last“

That sounds great! But if you stand by that then I assume you’ll just be single forever after your break up.

Sorry if I’m discouraging anyone.

Dont get me wrong. I support relationships and hope they last til the end of time. We all do!

And to those in one now, I encourage you to keep hoping.

Hope, faith and love is all you got. Because you can’t predict the future. All u have is statistics and past experiences to look at. And neither are good.

After 23 years of marriage my parents divorced. Like wtf? Not even Jesus thought they would separate.

Even perfect relationships don’t last.

I cant think of anyone I know who’s parents still together. The few that are still together are just holding due to years of financial ties, are just too comfortable with their marriage and afraid of change or the separation just hasn’t happened yet

Couples from our past generations (like our grandparents) are still together because thats what life was built on back then. Pure love.

Today its finding the baddest chicks and the most ball’n niggas.

Countless times I’ve heard ppl say just got out of a __ year relationship. Like its not even surprising anymore.

Then they hook up with another person just so they can tell another “I just got out if a __ year/month relationship” story again.

How many relationships have you been in?

How many times have you told this story?

Not one person reading this can say they’re STILL with their very first bf/gf today and plan to be with them forever.

If so God sees ur lies

I’ve had a few relationships I knew had a slim chance of lasting while I was in it but fought hard to keep em.

Again it’s not just the negative thought thinking it won’t last because who thinks like that when they’re in love?

But how long does “in love” last?

Being “in love” is temporary.

It’s just an emotional high. You’re both excited. You both call each other every night. Hang out everyday. Sex is amazing even tho physically it’s no different from what you’ve had before. It’s just your emotional high making it so awesome.

But once you’ve settled, now you two have gotten used to each other. You know what and what not to expect. The things you don’t like you deal with.
You see patterns evolving after time that make you think differently about your partner. Then other distractions start to tempt you but love and stability is the only thing keeping you faithful.
Then after a while you see and hear what could be better for you. Other people start looking more and more attractive.

At this point… your emotional high is officially blown.

After a few arguments, now your Facebook status is “it’s complicated”
(for the few of you who still use it)

Now you’re trying to work on things.

I know many of you that are at this stage now.

Many make it thru, many don’t.

For those who are fortunate enough to make it thru, now you’re love is reignited but it’ll NEVER be the same as how you felt when you first fell in love.

Because now you know what to expect.
They say “I’ll change” and may see their efforts but you know the true person they are.

While your maintaining your newly constructed relationship, you still have other options on stand by. Who you now keep a respectable connection with but still with a just in case in the back of your head.

And while you’re doing that, so is your partner. Or in most cases, they’re already banging their ‘just in cases’.

Now at this point they have no desire to do everything for you anymore. Now you just have to deal with who they are.

Or vise versa.

This is where you get tired. Fed up. Lines like “I deserve better” gets thrown in the air. Then “you don’t do shit for me” may follow or “you’ve changed”

And once a “you complain too much” gets thrown at you, then you realize your partner doesn’t care anymore.

Now you’re going thru your partners phone. Checking their Twitter/FB.

You notice they don’t talk about you to other people or on twitter anymore. They’re not posting pics of you two on instagram anymore.

Now you start assuming the worst.

So those ‘just in cases’ you had on the bench are now your substitutes and at the check in table, taking off their warmups and ready to come into the game.

Then you can stop caring about your partner not caring.

At this point somebody’s heart gets broken. Whether your partner beats you to the punch or you axe it.

But from the beginning your hopes were this relationship would last forever.

They never do.

Now I do believe love can last forever. With out a doubt. You can love someone time the end of time after you’re not with them anymore.

I’ll never stop loving my kids mother. We’ll never EVER get back to together but love is still there and will always be.
We have a friendship. Tho we still argue here and there, she’s considered family.

It’s healthy. And I advice those of you with bm/bd’s to find a cordial relationship. It’s the best thing ever for your kids.

It’s easy to love someone because it’s natural. It’s part of our natural human characteristics to love. But of course you don’t have to be attracted or have feelings for someone to love them.

I can tell a homegirl I love them just because were cool like that. Tho sometimes you gotta be careful who you throw the L bomb at. Emotionally weak folks can take that and fall in love. Then you have a problem.

But again I’m not being negative nor discouraging relationships.

When I see my next potential relationship I won’t be negative and say it won’t last forever but I won’t be so naive to say it will.

I’ll just live in the moment and do my best to make her happy as she makes me happy.

My very last relationship I couldn’t grasp why she wouldnt give it a chance after I put my very all into it…tho my mind very well knew.

Being in love can easily block ur intelligence.

Lucky for us being in love is only temporary. Once u regain ur intelligence everything I’ve said will make perfect sense.

I wouldn’t mind being in love again… tho I know I’ll have to sacrifice my full intellect. But that’s where trust comes in.

And trust is hard to give someone these days. Especially trusting someone with your heart knowing relationships don’t last forever.

Ask yourself…

If you’re in a relationship right now, how long do you realistically think it’ll last?

I’m sure that’s hard to answer. But think about.

To bring light to this, LOVE is meant to last forever. Once you truly love someone it never ceases. No matter what.

Love a friend. And love that friend forever. Even when they stab you in the back.

The minute you put a title on your friendship is when it all goes downhill.

Relationships are NOT meant to last.

But love is forever.